Monday, May 7, 2007

Driven Activity

19 days. Oh my Science.

I suppose this is the calm before the storm. I cleared out the last of the construction and irregular furniture from Baby Chaud's room yesterday. The crib is built, my journalism class concluded, and there's only three more episodes of Lost until next February. Life seems to be giving me a few weeks respite before I'm expected to care for a another human being for the rest of his life.

In terms of delivery, everything is in place. The kid won't be so big as to complicate things, he's in the proper Life Ejection Pose and I have a cell phone to call people.

Of course, there's always room for questions. My classic education as a scientist has only reinforced my inquisitive nature. I like to find answers, only second to asking questions. I don't worry about passing this nature on to my son, as he will be saturated in my daily behavior. I relish the day he asks me, "Why?" Hopefully I will never be able to give him a satisfying answer. Satisfaction is the opiate for the masses, yes?

To be perfectly honest, I knew last summer I was finally ready to raise a kid. There's been a certainty behind that ever since. I don't care to disclose the reasons behind that, but the differences are distinct for me. I've never cared to do something according to protocol or tradition, especially if I'm told without reason or denied an experiment. In fact, most of the conflict in my life comes from those situations where I'm hamstrung or outright denied such activity.

I'm certain I'm ready to be a father. It's a feeling I've only had one other time in my life, and that was the day I told Nicole I loved her, about 30 days after we started dating. That's worked out pretty well for me.

Time for a little more throttle.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Or as we say in athletics "Put me in, coach!"
You'll do fine. The baby is blessed to have such caring parents.